Taeyeon posts a heartfelt letter apologizing to Jonghyun for not being there for him

On December 19, Taeyeon posted a message via Instagram for the late artist. Her message stated, 

"That was you, and if another you existed, everyone will still love you. I want to like you, love you, and encourage you. I want to hug you once more. That's what I could've done but I hate myself for regretting like this after losing my chance. 

Our unfortunate, precious Jonghyun. Our Jonghyun, who I feel like will answer Yes! in a high tone if I call right now on the phone, I miss you so much. I'm sorry I didn't embrace you enough. I love you and thank you. 

I remember you telling me about how you wrote 'Lonely' with me in your thoughts. We are very similar and alike. We know those feelings. 

Kim Jonghyun, the most special, cool, fantastic artist in my life, I miss you so much and I want to hold your hand. 

Jonghyun-ah, you are the best. You worked so hard. I will make sure you're not lonely."

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A day earlier on the 18th, Jonghyun died from carbon monoxide poisoning. Taeyeon and many other fellow SM artists have canceled their upcoming schedules in response to the shocking news. 

Meanwhile, Jonghyun's funeral processions are scheduled to take place on December 21. 

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If you or someone you know is at risk of self-harm or suicide, seek help as soon as possible by contacting agencies specializing in crisis intervention and suicide prevention in the United States and abroad.