Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Wildwest85, Oct 12, 2019.
My mum wanted me to stop dating a crazy chick but I thought she is even more crazy.
This wasn’t a legitimate fight but lol my mom got drunk and started throwing pieces of dog kibble and those big uncracked walnuts at me lol
one of the last times i still lived w/ my mom she fell asleep on the bathroom floor & when i asked her to move she told me to pee on myself (true story, i waited around an hour for her to move & i actually had to call my grandma to pick me up for her place)
I don't expect much from my family anymore, but I still got really upset and even cried on the phone because my father basically told me to stay at my crappy job because I might not be capable of getting anything better and it kinda broke my heart all over again. It wasn't really a fight but I told my mother again that the way they treat me even now is not okay and continuously causes me harm
my career path
Hmmm, our last fight was back in 2011...
Spoiler: Long story ahead
I had to leave my job (stay at home nanny for my aunt) and go to my mums home for a week I was coming up to 3 months pregnant at the time, and I had yet to tell her more I didn't want to because how she was before I left to work for my aunt (she's semi petty when It comes to my dad's family, so we hadn't talked at all since I left a good 2months)
Anyway...i was upset that she had yet again decided to be selfish stop taking her medication and had a relapse she knew better at this point, she knew what would happened to the kids she' oh so loved' especially since I wasnt living there anymore, they would go into care hence I had to go back to make sure that didn't happen....being pregnant made me extra emotional so I was pissed off, mainly cause in the back of my head I knew this would happen again, I understand her illness but when she was well her decision we never logical which was why I was so pissed off again. The previous summer she managed to get out of the hospital by convincing the psychiatrist she was well and she could leave, she was ill at home, I gave up another job to stay with my siblings and all savings I ever had went toward all the debt she racked up and had to gather her family because the psychiatrists would listen to me when I said she was still ill so they had to get involved much to my mothers dismay and they finally put her back on a medication injection form.
So yeah she'd had purposely missed her appointment this time round for her monthly injection so as soon as she came through the door I was going to leave.. I really didn't want to even speak to her.
She walked in normally, 'hi Mel, how are you?' like nothing happened like she had just went to the shop, she always did this not because she forgot her schizophrenic episodes and decision leading up to it, she always remembered everything I had caught her out a couple times but when she was asked directly via intervention for the decisions she had made while well but also to acknowledge the damage she did cause her kids, she faked ignorance, blamed other people or avoided it all together.
This was the same shit.. So I walked to the kitchen grabbed my stuff and hugged my sister and told her to call me if anything happens....alot of shit happened but we won't get into that lol
Anyway my mother comes in like 'why are you like this to me, what did I do? '
'Really what did you do... I don't want to get into this right now' so I walked back to the living room at sat for a moment cause the morning sickness was throwing me off completely...shes was the reason my blood pressure spiked really which my doctors weren't to happy about hence being around her wouldn't have been good for my pregnancy.
She comes in sits down gives me this puppy eyed look.. And I lose it
I basically just said she can't keep doing this, I can't keep running back and giving everything I have to clean up her messes. That okay when she's ill I get it but when she was well and well through medication she was always selfish thus why we had to survive on our own as a children, why my siblings didn't view her like a mother. Then I blurt out I was pregnant because she was trying to make her excuses for not going to her appointment for her medication (mainly cause she wants to get married and have more kids... =_=)
She stopped talking and just was like your pregnant I'm so happy... I started crying at this point as I said regardless if she was happy or not can't raise my child around her and don't want to be in a position were I ever pick anything over my kids, so I'm done with her and done with this bullshit... I stormed out angry and tearful and just went straight back to my aunts, my mother I didn't talk until my son was 2 months old (8 months, she wasn't at my birth nor did she call to congratulate me, but apparently she told all her friends about her grandchild =_=, she tried to stop my siblings from coming to see me at hospital, they went anyway without her) , when I called her she told me to come back cause she knew we were technically homeless and leaving in mouldy box room atm the time... I didn't want to go back but my sons life was more important.
She died two years later.. The time spent withher wasn't great either she had her moments.. Mainly guilt ridden.. She was only nice towards the end when she realised she was going to die... She apologised for everything and thanked me for taking care of my siblings all these years in a phone call from her hospice before her a body failed her in the next 24 hours.
It was a bittersweet moment I excepted nevertheless... It was enough.
All I can say is you are great dealing what life has been coming after. Pretty sure not many can handle it the way you did had they been where you were. You have done what you could to mum and siblings, more than you should in my opinion. Make peace with god even you dont believe there is one.
Where's your lovely dad when all of you needed him?
Do what you think right.
Any better job in mind to go for ?
oops..was she drunk or stoned telling you to do that?
I'm still considering several things
applying for something better in my current company or doing school while still working there, looking for a completely new job elsewhere, or going to school and getting a new job..
Mum got mad because we went shopping and I didn’t buy anything... I had told her I would LOOK for clothes and for her that meant “I will 100% come out with hands full of bags”
Sorry for not wasting your money
I don't have big fights with my mom just arguments. The last one was probably because I have a pretty sarcastic personality, basically 80% of what I say have a sarcastic tone, and she hates that, so everytime she can she "mocks" it and we get in "Let's-see-who-has-a-better-comeback championship" until we are tired.
It's tiring because we do that at least twice a day, but we are both stubborn so...
My mom and I don't get in fights much but I kinda just gave a lazy response and she clicked her tongue and I said rude and we both burst into laughter while apologizing to each other.
tbh idk, probably? she blew me up the next morning asking me where tf i was & that she didnt remember any of last night
I told her my dad is cheating on her and she said no because no girls will like my dad but her ._. I mean facts but he has money! girls like guys who has money
She didn't agree with my life choices and we had lots of debates about my lifestyle preference in general